Wally Wendell Wadsworth IV is passing through Frog Squat Al …(near our H.A.S. corporate headquarters)….and stops at the main office to ask this important question.. Dear Hugh…. I have a pet gerbil. What is the best way to groom and care for a small “rat-like” vermin pet?

From Hughy


Cut out the formality Wally….!!!

We’re just standing here talking…..

Anybody whom drops by the corporate headquarters

can just CHAT….

without all the …”dear hughy” stuff….


I’m a knot-headed ole goofball……..No Floormatily is necessary.



Who on earth would want a rat for a pet…..?

Why not get a PET ROCK?…Like they did back

in the seven tease…?


The best way to groom a Gerbil….

Is to carefully place it on the trunk lid

of a ’76 AMC GREMLIN Automobile…


And run it through the gentle cycle of the Local Carwarsh.

The little rascal may not get completely clean….

But when he comes outta there…he’s gonna

have a different attitude about things.


Many people find that, after this operation,

the gerbil will be marginally agitated.

So I am going to suggest that you avoid interacting

with it in any close proximity for several weeks.


You can talk to it from a distance…..But don’t get two clothes.



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