Little Mumpy Mellman makes many many mentions of things he’d like to know about…I cant answer ’em all today. However I will make his world a better place in which to live by clearing up this question… Dear Hugh, I inadvertently pushed my 9 year old screechy, screaming annoying sister into the washing machine and shut the lid. I figure a good wash job would do her whiny little self some good… What wash cycle should I use for a nine year old.? I’ve washed my big brother a couple of times on the “gentle delicate cycle”.





From Washed up Hughy


Well Mumspter…… This is a question i get quite often.

IF you insist on washing little sis “Hulgalard” ……

Make sure that your mommy is keeping a close eye

on the situation

There are certain risks involved if you mistakenly

hit the”extra wash” button.

The risks include juvenile vertigo (sudden onset)

and “Bad Maaad Angry Sister Syndrome” (sudden onset)


The way to know what cycle to use for

a nine year old screechy sister is

to simply notice if her outfit she’s

wearing is dark or light..

You have to use the light colored

clothes cycle for whites and pale pastels

And the dark colored cycle for anything else.

Its really that simple.


The SPIN cycle is where everybody will have the

most fun. But I’ll tell you this Mumpy….

When this deal is over…. You better get yourself

out of there in one more hurry. You are gonna

be in big trouble ……………………………………..

once Hulgalard dries out and is able to stand up.


Trust me on this stuff Mumps……

Ive been in big trouble with mad sisters.

Its risky business when you have a

dizzy water-logged chick running loose.


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