Gertrude Dowdy from Possum Fling Tennessee writes Dear Hugh: How do you keep you hundreds of employees there at the Service.. ..in line? I know you run a tight ship to be able to dessiminate so much useful and applicabelsitic imfornation with so fhugh mistakes.

From Old In Line Hughy

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Howdy Dowdy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What a grate question. This even gives me the IDEA that perhaps I should start travelling the country lecturing on Company management and FONICS. I cud tye thee too thangs twogether and MAKE AYE FOURCHUNE…..!

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But to answer you question on how I keep my employessss in LINE….

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Our office complex is a very long narrow building.  The dimensions are 3 feet wide and 4000 feet long (except for the banquet room..which is 8 by 8 to allow room for people to mill around). These construction arrangements facilitate everyone LINING UP with what I say.

AND OHHHHHHHH how important that is.

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Also…..disciplinary procedures are quite rigid and emfourced with reckless abandon………….I once asked an ninteen year old intern.. to Balance a sweet potato on his nose for ten minutes…. because he forgot to call me SIR. But frankly, I’ve gotten a litlle more lacadaisical in my old age….

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Another possible technique for keeping folks in line ….Is to have em all working on a tightwire stretched over a big vat of green jello.

NOW LOOK…………. DONT BE WHINING ABOUT THIS STUFF BEING CORNY…. YOU HAD TO KNOW this wasnt gonna be anything worth reading.

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