Little Billy Woothington from Sipe Tennessee writes Dear Hugh: Rumors around town are saying that , along with often diving into the paths of speeding locomotives to save kittens and other small mammals of various types, and answering billions of questions from readers,……..you are also a starting split end for the Atlanta Falcons but playing under a false name to avoid noteriety…….Is this true?

 

From Hughy

/

Hi Little……………I do knot no how these rumors get started………….After all I’ve done to seek the promulgation of facts only. It is absolutely not true that I am playing for the Atlanta Falcons as a clandestine split end………….NO TRUTH TO THAT AT ALL. It’s the New York Jets….and it’s not split end,….its halfback……..

.

The very idea of being a split end repulses me. My dear sister always complained about split ends and tried to eliminate them entirely. I never understood why she was constantly saying…”I’ve got to do something about split ends.” I picked up the animosity that so many females have and I would never play that role on a team. Never.

.

The rumors about the speeding trains are also blown all out of porpution……The locomotives arent usually speeding. they are well within the speed guidelines laid out by the authorities.



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